Have I posted this before? I don’t care. It’s so funny. (I hope the link works - I’m just listening to this on my ipod so I don’t know if the video above is the same)
Dear Entertainment Weekly,
Thanks so much for puttin’ a picture of Leonardo DiCaprio on the cover of your magazine. I like him, so you can imagine I was sure pleased to see a picture of him on the front of your book! It is nice of you to put pictures of things I like on your magazine front-part. For future reference, here are some other things I like. I like tomatoes, umbrellas (all kinds), some dogs, most cats. There’s a cat in my neighborhood named Speedy I’m awful fond of; maybe you could put a picture of him on your magazine. I don’t know if you’d send a photo-grapher to take a picture of him, or a sketch artist to draw a picture of him, but you’d better be quick ‘cause they don’t call him Speedy for nothing! Oh well. All the blood’s leaving my head now, so I’d better sign off.
The Emptiest Person Alive